Last night, at around 8:45pm, I came face to face with a demon from my past. Army Boy.
I'd like to say that it didn't bother me at all but it did. Here's the story.
Back in '99 I met Joe through an ex-boyfriend. Within the first 4 hours of meeting, he told me he loved me and from there the fire burned intense. We were always together and we ( I truly believed) loved each other very much. But there was one small problem with our relationship. He was 16. I was 22. His mother hated me. Things were turbulent for the year and a half we were together.
I'm not sure who Laura hated more. Me or her son. It seemed she was always calling the police on him because he would say or do something he didn't like. She called the police so many times that they finally yelled at her that they weren't a chauffeur service for her to take her son to his girlfriend's house. But she would also call my dad and tell him these outrageous stories about her Joe and I were planning on eloping. She is crazy.
Joe had decided to enroll in the army for a few reasons. One to get away from his mom and two because he dropped out of high school, got his GED and was working at Pizza Hut. He had no focuse or future for his life.
It was really really hard went he went to boot camp. He was stressed. I was stressed. After his graduation, he decided he didn't want to be in the army anymore so he decided to say if he had to go back he would commit suicide. So he went to Strong Hospital and he was admitted to the psychiatric ward where he was for a week. After he got out, his recruiter told him that he had to report for duty but that he would probably get discharged. The day he left to go back to Georgia we said I love you to each other and he said he would see me in a week.
I never heard from him again until this past Thursday.
His mom broke up with me for him about two months after he left. She told me that he didn't want to talk to me. And I cried. I cried for a long time. I was still trying to get over him and deal with his silence when Jim came back from Virginia for a visit. I hadn't gotten completely over Joe when Jim and I started dating. But I figured I would never see or hear from Joe again so I never fully dealt with all the emotions his leaving gave me.
It was very akward seeing him and his friend on monroe Ave. He looked just as uncomfortable as I felt and all I wanted to do was run away. I could kick myself now because there were so many things I've been wanting to say to him for the past six years and I just stood there like a dork. Bah.
Now it's time to deal with my emotions 'cause seeing him again especially so close to my home, means that I have a lot of anger towards him still. And it's not healthy to harbor so much anger for 6 years. I'm writing him a letter to tell him I need to talk and that I hope he can give me some closure. We'll see what happens.
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